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Poker at your place

If a shot at the World Series was beyond the budget this year, hold your own version of the world’s top poker event in the comfort of your own home with these cracking bits of kit.

CUSTOM TABLE

Custom-made in Liverpool, these full-size poker tables are every bit as good as those you’ll find in a real cardroom. Choose your felt and rail colours, opt for drinks holders or kidney shape for a dealer seat and have your own logo or design printed on the baize. The dog’s nuts.

£425; www.cardroomdirect.com

PLAYING CARDS

Thsee custom-designed decks are printed on cellulose-acetate, used exclusively for the prestigious KEM brand of playing cards. Backs feature artwork from Bicycle brand’s famous ‘Rider Back’ design with World Series and Bicycle logos.

£19.99; www.kemplayingcards.co.uk

POKER CHIPS

These fully customisable poker chips are printed in-house with your choice of design and bring a classy, bespoke feel to any home game. (So now you can get those Worksop Series of Poker chips you’ve always wanted).

£various; www.squirrelpoker.co.uk

HOME DEALER

There are a wide range of home dealer services on the market now, with many companies providing a dealer plus their own tables, chips and chairs. They’ll even send you off for 10-minute penalties if you don’t behave yourself.

£various; www.dialadealer.com

MASSEUSE

Relieve the tension and fury of another bad beat with the best rubdown in town. Xhilirate’s girls have massaged the shoulders of the world’s top players at London’s finest casinos and various European Poker Tours. The lovely ladies now provide a service for the home.

£60/hr; www.Xhilirate.co.uk

BRANDED THREADS

Every serious player these days is pictured plastered (not that way) in logos from their online sponsors. So get involved and cash in those player points! For that ‘Negreanu’ look, head to PokerStars’ VIP Store for t-shirts, caps and hoodies.

SHIRT: 2,500 pts
CAP: 600 pts
HOODIE: 2,250 pts

SHADES

These tell-masking poker sunglasses have a dual dielectric anti-reflective lens coating that actually brightens the room whilst providing 98 percent shielding from all angles. Perfect for shielding your shifty gazes as you go all-in with rubbish yet again.

£49.97; www.royal-eyewear.com

TUNES

Everyone’s got a sodding iPod these days haven’t they? These Apple snobs are taking over the world. Rebel against them and show your fellow poker players that you dare to be different. The Archos 7, with its superb seven-inch screen has huge disk capacity (160GB/320GB) combined with internet and TV capacity. You’re opponents will be so distracted that you’ll have their chips in no time. £180; amazon.co.uk

OVERSIZED HEADPHONES

So you’ve got your shades and your mp3 player, now all you need to look the part is a pair of ridiculous DJ-style headphones. These Skullcandy beauties have a fur-lined head-strap and killer bass. Phil Ivey, eat your heart out.

Ti Black Fur Headphones £42.13; www.amazon.co.uk

MINI-FRIDGE

If a handy waitress isn’t to hand, invest in one of these even handier beer fridges to keep the drinks cold and close by. Holding roughly 16 cans of lager, you won’t have to dash off to the kitchen. Much.

£149.74; www.amazon.co.uk

BOOZE

You’ve got your ‘cooler’ sorted, now stock up on some top quality American refreshment. Drinks holders cost extra.

Case of Samuel Adams Boston Lager - £33.68; www.thedrinkshop.com

Case of Sierra Nevada Summerfest - £32.40; www.beerritz.co.uk

OFFICIAL NUTS/SNACKS

If the official beef jerky of the World Series isn’t irrelevant enough for you, get your own British version and award the player of the day with a pack of Blighty’s favourite snack. Or just scatter them around as sponsors’ giveaways. Yum.

Monster Munch (12 Pack); £3.30

TOURNAMENT DIRECTOR

The choice of casinos and major tournaments the world over, the unsurpassable Tournament Director software allows you to enter players’ names, set blind levels and adjust prize structures. Don’t set up without it.

£21; www.thetournamentdirector.net

CARD GUARDS

Protecting your hand with a card guard is far more about looking cool than the actual worry of your hand being exposed – in our opinion anyway. It’s all about showing off. With that in mind, you’re going to want one that looks the business and is distinctly yours. Get yourself a custom-made one in the design of your choice, which can include any poker hand you want engraved into the guard.

From £26; www.pokerguard.com

WATCH

Hard one to pull off, but certain people can get away with wearing a poker-themed wristwatch. Our lovely former cover girl and super-brainy poker pro Vanessa Rousso wears an absolute belter, for example. If you think you can pull it off and look more champ than chump, then a mid-price option is the Sector men's 280 Series chronograph silver poker watch. For the heavily inebriated, it even bears the mantra: ‘Stay off tilt’.

£165; amazon.com

BLING

So you’ve finally finished your deep-stack, mega buy-in home game and you need to award the winner with something a bit better than a handful of tatty fivers and his taxi fare home. These custom-made silver, gold, or platinum bracelets are just the business.

£various; www.mikeshorerjewellery.com

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